Friday, July 30, 2010

It's the little things.......that piss me off!

STOP signs and red lights........NOT a suggestion.

If your kid is 3 and in diapers and tells YOU that they need to go potty, don't tell them to "do it in your diaper". That is just LAZY ASS parenting. Even the 3yr old knows that!

If you come spend 3 days in my home, look away from your IPhone at least once. Seriously. Just once. And take your dirty dishes off my table and bring them to the sink, I got it after that. Really.

Everyone lives tight these days. Some more than most. I am a penny pincher, we live off one income in this home. We are not the bank. Unless you are going to give me collateral of equal value (kids not accepted), we have no money to "give" you.

Don't tell me about your infidelities to your spouse. I don't condone but you are a grown ass person. When your spouse kicks you out, you cannot live here and yeah "I TOLD YOU SO!"

Friendship works both ways. You bitch, I listen. I bitch, you listen. So? When are you going to let me have my turn?

School starts soon. Yay! It may cost parents a fortune but in the end, 40 hours a week is a nice break for you. And for me too, even though I have no kids, because YOUR kids are not skateboarding in the middle of my street now. I will gladly provide each of you with a free notebook, just for the peace and quiet.

Skinny bitches, quit telling me your fat. You are the size of my leg, and let me tell you, I have awesome legs under a fat stomach. They are beautiful and shapely and you are still smaller than them so STFU already. Why? Because I am grouchy b/c I am hungry and you are eating a whole pizza that weighs more than you and you will probably lose 2 lbs from using all that energy to hold it up to your mouth yet you are so fat you are in a size 0. You know, the size that is so big it shouldn't even exist right? Wow, sorry that rant just kinda hit me from nowhere about skinny people......anywho......

Well that's the things that piss me off for today. Tomorrow is a whole other story.

11 comments:

  1. I need a like button here like on facebook. LIKE!!!!!
    You're words are a thing of beauty to me :)

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  2. LOL Amanda, I am totally PMS'ing.

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  3. Bahahaha, thanks for the giggle :-)

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  4. GO IN YOUR DIAPER?!

    No words.
    That person should give the child to a person who cares enough to parent. I weep for the future sometimes.

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  5. All very annoying, even to read. Sending you a virtual big glass of wine.

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  6. OMG, that was too funny! I HEAR YOU.

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  7. AMEN SISTER!! I just found your blog tonight and love it! Nice to find a kindred spirit.

    If you feel so inclined, come visit my blog as well, we're a group of 5 women all trying to lose weight in our own way but share the same end goal/reward. We'd love to have you stop by! http://nudemotivation.blogspot.com

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  8. LOL, I can't believe a mom would tell the kid to go in their diaper. I'm glad you vented girl, hilarious. Hope you have a better day today!

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